She is still leaning on the backyard bench as usual, as she did every day. She is wearing a knit shirt and a scarf that was neatly attached to her neck. She is not strong enough to withstand the cold air of this season, nor could she withstand the coldness of the world to herself. Page after page of the book she read, my grandma liked those romance fiction stories collected by my brother in his reading room. Reading one by one book on the shelf of my brother's reading room is like her favorite habit since her memory began to be disrupted. Her nearsighted eyes do not let her read for too long, just around 30 minutes to treat longing and making comfort her days. At precisely 5:30 p.m., after her body is scented with the scent of essential oil which she rubbed on her wrists, she would go behind with her book, she almost did it for seventeen months. She doesn't do it alone, Mersey; the golden cat will always stay by her. I know she gives the cat a necklace with the initial M on it, just like my grandfather's name. But, I should not mention his name in front of my grandma. It is like something taboo to talk about people who have died here. Even though we have not been completely sincere, there are still wounds that have not been treated for his leave.
I guess I don't have a harmonious family background like others, but it isn't too bad for me. At least we enjoyed the days we spent together, right?. Sometimes my father is too busy working in his office, even his face is too old for a man of half a century's age. But his smile that always shines all the time makes it not look the slightest old in my eyes. He is too charismatic and I'm even afraid that my father would impress others and like him too much. Huh, I never expected it would be real. I'm too jealous of little things about my father than what my mother does. She was always calm, thinking ahead and gracefully, which made my father admire her. It might because she works at a yoga training place, I don't know it but since she works there, she becomes better in controlling her emotions. They don't have much difference in age, just about 2 or 3 years, it makes them like newlyweds when they went to our neighbor's wedding a week ago. I don't think anyone has the same habit as me, who always over thinking, being careless, and talking too much. Yeah, my brother is like a typical person who doesn't talk too much. He just spent his time in his reading room, for reading or writing, that's all. His job is like his habit for him and he can do it all the time, oh god; I can't help myself thinking about all this. Everyone in this house is indeed calming, especially for me who is sometimes too sensitive about anything. "Grandma, let's have dinner together, it's already half-past seven. C'mon", she frowned asking me not to be noisy, so Mersey which is sleeping on her lap doesn't wake up.
When we are at the dinner table, my brother usually asks her to share what story she has been reading the backyard bench with Mersey. He just can do it to train my grandma's memories that were no longer as perfect as before, even though we know; there is no human had perfect memories in this world. She is old, but still nimble and very sensitive as usual, like me. Her feeling is so soft till fictional romance stories could make her cry incidentally. She will tell us every little part of the story she has read and what she could remember. Everything is not always like our expectations. Day by day her age is increasingly calculated, it has reached eighth in a century that doesn't allow her to have a good memory perfectly, and we just help as much as possible.
"I will bring my girlfriend to come home next week, maybe after her launch book event over. I'm not sure, it could be around 8 pm". My brother said casually to us. This is the first time he dares to bring his girlfriend home after many dramas have appeared in my family. Not violence, but sadness that we don't know what else to do.
"How? Can I?" my mother asked, he looked a little stiff.
"(Take a deep breath) do what you think is good, you're an adult now". That's all an old man can say with a smile.
I know this is not a good thing for everyone. Should I be happy or sad?
My grandma's hand trembled, Mersey jumped out from her lap. "Are you going to cheat on me again?" she asked in a plain and very polite tone. As smooth as silk that you cannot even dare to deny. And she repeated the same thing. Nobody answered this old woman's question. The ringing sound of my brother's phone ended this awkward situation. I can be a little relieved. Well, having Alzheimer's at the age of nearly a century is a common thing. But it is not usual to acknowledge your grandchildren as your husband.
"Can I come to your reading room?" I asked my brother
"Just come when you have finished your dinner, don't bring any extra food to my room".
Well, I know he hates me when I bring any food to his favorite room. Moreover, only my brother and I can stay up late just to spend our time in his reading room, his favorite place. We often discuss many things together, while our parents have to take enough rest to start a fairly solid routine every day, and my grandma? She always slept well before 9 pm, with Mersey as always. Sometimes, it worries me about her health condition. Whether she is happy with us or not, I don't know for sure.
"I'm sure you don't intend to read a book here, what do you want?"
"Why do you always suspect me like that?"
"Well, that's the character of young people, mostly they just do what they like, what they need to do, or because they just want to know something, huh?"
"Damn it, you are indeed my brother, dude!"
"Please put this book on that table," pointing to the small table near the entrance.
"Why don't you put it on the bookshelf, you will blame me if this room is a mess, I don't want you to be accused carelessly"
"Ahh, this girl. That's the book which Grandma read this afternoon, just put it there. Do not talk too much"
"Oh. Haha, alright."
I'm stretched out on the sofa near his chair, look around and playing my phone. Suddenly he nudged my hand until my phone fell.
"Hey, how impudent"
"Hahahaha, it's been so long time I never bothered you"
"Well, you changed quite quickly over a long period, why?"
"Yeah, that's how it is. I even had to contemplate for 7 days to dare myself to say that I want to bring my girlfriend home”
"You are always like that. Never mind, just stop it"
"Do you know what grandma feels right now?" my brother said quietly.
Yeah, the man left the house in the afternoon, just as the sun began to set on the western horizon. His left hand was held by a woman in a white uniform with a small hat attached to her head. It is hard, and very cruel, said my father, who revealed his frustration when he was 18 years old. Every sweet moment you did will never be a guarantee for you if a man doesn't have any principles. However, this is not a matter of feeling, this is also not a matter of male loyalty that must be shared with another woman. It is more complicated. My grandfather suffered from lung disease for a long time since he was married, I forgot what the disease's name. He also has cancer attacks on his respiratory tract and it is cruel enough to be the reason why this old man left my poor grandma. No one knows for sure why he suddenly left home. Many neighbors nimbly created rumors that my grandfather had an affair with another woman, some even said he had remarried long ago. But, wait. At the beginning of June, around three weeks after that man left home. My father got a text from his friend who accidentally met that old man at the hospital. "Is this his karma for what he did? No!".
Day after day, my father often skipped school just to go to the hospital to accompany the old man. My father told me how his mother's condition was getting worse every day; he was just moody, locked herself in her room, and reduced her social interactions. She even stopped participating in volunteer activities. But God said differently, my father was more shocked when he found out the reason that the man left his mother only because of a disease that continued hurt his body.
"Then, does Grandma know it?" I asked him
My brother thinks it for long enough, It's just a conversation very complicated enough to be discussed again. "Maybe she knows, but after the day our grandfather died. That's what makes her sick for so long and damaging her nerves, her memory started to have problems since then"
Forgetting every particular thing is not always easy as what we say in words, it's more complicated. Instantly the bell rang, it was a sign that my brother has come along with his girlfriend. We have dinner a little bit late at that time, having to wait for their arrival. Many things we have talked about, about family, their jobs, and little jokes from my parents that I do not even understand. The old woman beside me looked glum, stroking Mersey's head on her lap. It seems we are tired of laughing, my brother also said he got headaches and it makes us stop our activity that night.
"(Running towards the kitchen) Has anyone seen grandma?
"In her room? or in the backyard bench? "
"There isn't anywhere," I said.
All worried that morning. An hour later an unknown number called my brother. Fortunately, my brother is very clever, he put his ID card in my grandma's wallet which she often brings anywhere when she left home. Well, at least it can help us if she gets lost like this.
"She is at the pharmacy at the end of the main road, I will pick him up now," my brother said.
"I want to go there too," I said, grabbing my brother's girlfriend.
The pharmacy guard looked shocked when he saw my brother, "Are you seriously this old woman's husband?"
"Oh no, she's my grandma"
"Aaaa. She talked a lot about you earlier, I guess what she said was true"
"I'm sorry sir, it's caused you trouble"
"It's okay, don't worry. Your grandma is very kind, she shares a lot of fictional stories with us here"
"Hahaha, is that the Madam Gold story?"
"Yeah, I guess, it's a truly sad story. You are indeed a great writer, your grandmother must be very proud of you”
"Oh no, no. That is a true story from her life, I'm just an intermediary of it". The conversation was quite short that morning and we returned home.
My brother does have a very similar face with my grandfather, really similar. Until he married my sister-in-law, sometimes grandma still felt sad bout it. She could not distinguish between her husband and grandchildren, because Alzheimer's disease was increasingly making her confused and confused. She often goes out alone, she says, picking up her husband at a fork in the road near their house.
"Come quickly, do you always take a long time to go out of the house?"
"Be patient, it's almost done," I replied
The mother is busy preparing things to bring to visit the graves of grandma and grandfather. We were quite happy on this sweet day we gathered together to visit them. "Let's go!" said my father, who smiling at me. He knew I was always slow to do something, but he never scolded me, it makes me fall in love with him many times. Haha. It doesn't take a long time for us to arrive there.
"They must be happy together, right there"
"Of course, they should. Grandma, don't just read the novel there, okay? haha" said my brother
"Hey, you guys are so nosy," my father told us. My mother turned, "let's pray together for them".
THE END
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